MY COMPUTER AS A GRAMMAR TEACHER

Ms Word^® Microsoft with the grammar and spell check opened a door for me. I started using Word Star years ago, went to word Perfect, and finally to MS Word. People in my age group struggle to learn how to use these instruments and programs. We should not forget that contrary to modern children, just using the basic computer is a struggle for the older generations. My interest in using the computer was limited to using it using it as typewriter. With that in mind, I stripped all auxiliary programs off or avoided complicating things while I struggle to learn how to use it. All of this happened years ago.  Even wit the computer, my writing was terrible. I was dangling participles and splitting infinitives but above all else, the machine could not spell any better that I could. I have to admit I am not normal, that I have a mental disease; I am dyslexic.

Most people do no know what that diagnosis means. It means that I do not have the innate ability to order letters in a word, words in a sentence, sentences in a paragraph, or paragraphs in a story. Noam Chomsky, a famous linguist, seems to think there is a “universal grammar”; hence, grammar is innate and not learned. Without the right genes, trouble happens. Chomsky’s fame as a political activist sometimes detracts from his contribution to linguistics; he is controversial in both fields. However, from my experience with the disease, I think he is correct. My ability to spell is atrocious and my grammar is equally as bad—I have an educational history to prove it. Brain pathologists claim to be able to find anatomic evidence of dyslexic and autism by examining microscopic tissue.

To explain a little more about the affliction I will use my experience with my wife’s name. We have been married for over 60 years and you would think by now I would know how to spell her first name, which is Maudine—seven letters. At one time, I used her names as a password on my computer. Remember that the computer would not allow you to use it if you have the wrong password or even if you misspell the password. Very seldom could I type her name correctly the first time; sometimes it would take three or four attempts. In addition, spell-check programs do not check password for spelling. I have read that the problem dyslexic people have their minds wired so they see the letters in a different order; with the last letter moved to the first part of the word. This gives the impression their minds work faster than normal minds. The same holds true with sentences; the predicate comes first and the subject last, the conclusion of the story comes first and the introduction comes last resulting in a form of mental chaos.

Then came MS Word spell and grammar check entered my life. I had mastered the computer as a typewriter but my writing was bad. I will not bore you with how bad it really was but it sometimes got to the point my writing was incoherent. Whenever I turned on the “grammar and spell check” application, the page I had written turned in to a mass of red and green of underlined words and sentences. It was overwhelming so I turned it off then I realized that I had to do something. I turned on the spell and grammar check application as I wrote and not after I had finished. I struggled with individual word after individual word. I made a rule for my self; I would not use autocorrect. I would try to spell the word three times before I gave up and resorted to autocorrect. After the words wee all spelled correctly, it was a challenge to correct sentence structure or literally dozens of other errors in grammar. There is not auto grammar correct. In other word, I had to struggle with the sentence until the green underline disappeared. It was the same as having a teacher looking over my shoulder all the time but better.

Let me tell you about that teacher. She knew what she was talking about almost without error; however, she sometimes made me decide between alternatives. She was extremely patient. She would correct my miss spelling of “taht” to “that” sometimes three or four times in a row. She never missed a split infinitive and was strict about verb form. In addition, she made my writing more interesting as a direct result of forcing me to use the active voice but always gave me the option of using passive voice. Best of all, she never made fun of me for not being able to spell even the simplest of words. She was kind and gentle but grossly underpaid. She helped me to write and post about 1500 articles on this blog site and three books e-books and all it cost me to have her help me was “my” time.  

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